Monthly Archives: October 2011

Kinda like My favorite poem….


I get so stoked when it comes to winter time! It’s probably the romantic I am at heart. It makes me think of warm cider, scratch scarves, and twinkling lights. It fills me up with the urge to cuddle and bake!
I have never had to shovel snow. This is probably why I live it so! I love watching a soft snow falling on bare benches of a long asleep tree. The crunch it makes under snows boots, and when it makes my fingers so cold that they burn. But I am a fan of when the sky is gray and white.
The first time I heard “Stop by a wood on a snowy evening” by Robert Frost, it caught my imagination. Plus I know and love how it’s not just about snow and woods. How it’s about so many things including seduction, suicide, temptation…. And how the man resist the allure of the “woods” when he is reminded of his prior commitments. There is just so much I love about it because it is a rich, well written piece of art.

Stop by a wood on a snowy evening

Who’s woods these are I think I know
His house is in the village though
He will not see me stopping here
To watch his woods full up with snow

My little horse must think it quear
To stop without a farm house near
Between wood and frozen lake
On the darkest evening of the year

He gives his harness bells a shake
As to ask if there is some mistake
Thee only other sounds the sweep
Of easy wind and downy flake

The woods are lovely dark and deep
But I have promises to keep
And miles to go before I sleep
And miles to go before I sleep

-Robert Frost

As you can see it is an awesome poem and a great question maker. It works on so many levels. Thought provoking. I hope you think about it, if you have any questions ask! I would be happy to discuss thid in more detail!

-Cindy

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What if I were a Billionaire?


Let’s say, I had a billion dollars. What would I do with it? Well, I would probably spend it. First, I would probably get a nice house. Second, I would travel. Third, I would set up my future just in case. After all you never know!
Now, don’t get confused. I would give to charity as much as I could. The only reason I would buy a house is to have a place to keep my stuff. Probably, the stuff I bought on vaca. Nothing to assuming. Small and cute. I would have it decorated to be peaceful and cozy. A warm place to rest my head.
Travel!!!! I love to go places. I would probably start by making a list of interesting sounding places. I would enjoy every part of every place. My goal would be to live every place more than the last. Because everywhere you go there will be something beautiful that you can’t have anywhere elts!
Now I’m no fool. I know that money melts fast as ice in the dessert. I don’t really know how to make money grow but that’s what they have professionals for. And they would probably get alot of business from me.
I know its only dreaming. But sometimes tough have to say what if? I have decided (just now as I was typing) I am going to make mondays “What If Monday” besides monday can be hard. A little dreaming and pondering is called for! Not all of life can be serious.
-Cindy

Just when I thought it was safe


Have you ever gotten up in the morning excited about the day ahead of you? I have. Have you gone about your day happy unaware of impending doom? I have. Have you ever had someone get unreasonable angry at you with out a clear explanation of why they are so cross? Yeah? Me too.
Sometimes I think I know what I want. And in reality I do. I just have to go about it by another path. I was waiting on someone. Waiting for them to be ready. For me, for the future, for life. I realize now there is no need to wait for them, they may never be ready. Aka: I got dumped! :-p
I would be sad but I was already upset about it when this realization came to me. So, fret not world! The sun will come up tomorrow, there are plenty of fish in the sea… Blah, blah, whatever.
Besides, live and learn… And stuff. I can’t think of anymore platitudes right now. Besides platitudes make me want to punch people. And since I’m saying them, it would be my own face. And I can’t have that!
After all I am cuter than I have been in years and I get hit on all the time. Just the other day, after being dumped, I was on my way home on the train and the guy working in the train was hitting on me. If I had been in the mood to be flirted with….. Give me a few days, I’ll bounce back!
-Cindy

I’ll procrastinate later….


I can’t be the only one in existence that procrastinated. I can’t be sure about that because I was going to do research, but I put it off until later. You don’t have to convince me that it can be detrimental. I wonder if there is a way to stop? Even if someone told me how…….I would probably wait to get started. I’m thinking about cleaning up my act.
-Cindy

Beans beans the musical diet..


Today I am embarking on the task of starting my “diet.” To the dismay of a friend that I work with, my diet consist of beans everyday. Along with this is something green and egg whites. I have chosen spinach for my green today. Maybe I should invest in beano!
The most taxing part of this diet by far will not be eating the same thing six days a week. It will be eating every 3-4 hours. I never eat breakfast and sometimes skip lunch. I am pretty sure the creator of this wanted not to be hungry…ever. I am not sure how this will affect me, but hopefully I will remember to eat. I think I should set alarms to remind me untill I can get into the swing.
In truth I have no goal weight. As I said in my post, “More is less?” I really only want a good competition. So I guess this is winning via losing. Interesting concept….. I plan to keep you apprised of all the developments. Seeing as this is day one of eating.
If nothing elts I will develop some very good recipes for beans. Wish me luck! Also those around me…….
-Cindy

I can be spontaneous…..it just takes awhile.


This is mostly a rebuttal to yesterdays post about indecision. I have done things, Life things, with little time for consideration. Some of these things were great! Some if them turned out not so well. Regardless they bring me to my life an it is now.
When I was in college I went to visit my mom and brother. This seems innocent enough. They were at the time working in the carnival. My brother still does. I found it to few a silly amount of fun! So I went home after for about a week to deal with things. Then I set out and joined the carnival!!!! That, to date, was the most fun summer I have ever had. Always something to do. Basicly I insulted people and they have me money. It was one of the coolest things I have done. Travel, money, new interesting people all the time. Adventure awaited at every new place. Now, I take showers and have my teeth and have what most call an honest face so I was a bit different from the average “carnival barker.” And I kind of stuck out like a sore thumb. But that was part of the fun.
This experience caused me to reconsider my stance on being spontaneous. After life on the road that summer I ended up living in florida for a few years. When my sister asked me to move to california…. I said “ok!”
This stands as one of the worst decisions I have ever made. I, full of excitement and wonderment, flew out with basicly only what I could carry. To start a new chapter in life with family and california sunshine. Only to find that my sister had hidden her meth addiction from me.
As you know kids, meth’s side affects are never sleeping, never eating, and wildly irrational paranoia. This all add up to about three months of Hell. I ended up with way less than I started with. Literally, my sister kept taking my things braking them and I don’t know what.
Anyway, I’m here in cali now. And I have been for three years in january. My grandma took me in. and I have grown to love this beautiful place. Now sometimes I miss home. And I love to go back on vacation. I want to travel more and do things and I know if I go back I will never leave.
I know what I need to work out is being spontaneous with out being tempestuous. Good luck with that……
-Cindy

I can’t decided if I’m indecisive or not…


    I have come to realize that when faced with decisions I have a hard time making a choice. I just always want to consider all the possible options. For example last year I bought a coat. I tried on every coat in the store! And ended up buying the very first coat I tried.
    I know that some people are very decisive, and know with in seconds if something is for them. The irony is that this is what I do for a living: help people decide quickly what they want.  Often I know what the customer will choose before they do.
    The real problem comes when it is small things like what I want at a restaurant or which color to paint my nails. But real life decisions can take months to act on. This has caused problems in the past.
     The Robert Frost poem comes to mind: “The Road not Taken” Which is often referred to as “The road less traveled by.” (wrong…)  The author talks about wishing they had taken the other road. Now I have, on a few occasions, wished I had made a different choice in life. However, I know that my life is what makes Me.
     Some might say that making choices with the first answer that comes to mind would be the solution to this problem…. I have tried this too. It only works about 50% of the time. The real struggle is finding a happy medium between these. The struggle that I should really deal with is the questions of: “what if?”
    You can’t always wonder. Maybe just go out and try that other choice!! Add adventure and cure the ills of coulda, shoulda, woulda.
    I have always thought of myself as an optimist! But I realize now that life had made me a pragmatist. That’s the core of my decision making process. Make a choice then be prepared for the worst possible outcome. That way if I’m prepared…. It won’t be so bad. And I can still be happy with the choice.
    At least that’s what I’ve decided for now.
-Cindy

The Groceries are Gone!!!


Make no mistake, I love to shop. I window shop alot. Mostly because I work at the mall and get in lots of mall hours. Even groceries, I don’t mind shopping for… However, I don’t like that soon, Very soon, you have to go back for more. I find this to be very annoying. Don’t get me wrong, I’m a fast girl and love to eat food. I love to cook good, smell it. Taste it. EVERYTHING! But I don’t like to havr to make so many trips to the store to pick up the same ol’ things. Maybe that’s what really annoys me about it.
   I have considered not eating. This would solve this problem!! Alas, it only works untill several hours later when: Hmmm, what sounds good? Peanut butter sandwich? Ok. I guess I just don’t have the makings to be one of those “starve myself” kind of people.
   In reality that’s fine by me. I just wish there was some way to not have to go to the store all the time and still have food on hand. Take out is to much money to do all the time especially in my budget.
  Some may say buying in bulk is the solution! But I just can’t bring myself to allocate a large portion of my funds to something I will probably tire of quickly.it will be like a waste if money. That makes me more upset than having to buy groceries every week!
  Maybe I should invent something that generates the food I want with out having to leave the house…. My grandma would say how about a food replicator. And I would remind her this isn’t Startrek….. Silly Grandma!!! :-p 
  So I guess I am stuck with these options untill technology catches up with my demand. Ugh….untill next time
-Cindy

More is less?


I have decided to start a diet. My sister had been doing this diet for a while now and looks great! It is really easy. She says it doesn’t seem like a “diet” I say she is a bit loopy. But that’s ok. Really I’m just a little competetive (a lot you will come to find out) and want to see if I can beat her at this game. 😉 Also, get healthier. I will keep you posted on how it progresses.
-Cindy